Behind the Scenes - A Birthday Surprise

     I first spot them conniving (?) discussing something in hushed meow whispers on the landing outside our bedroom. There-huddled-they seem from a distance to be engaged in deep plotting. Theo is surrounded by Mico and Sienna. As I move closer, they disburse, immediately involved in other pursuits. Sienna stretches on one of the smaller cat trees in the hall. Mico wanders, devil may care, into the guest room. Theo is the only one who stands his ground.

      At that moment I don't know that Theo even knows how to read a calendar or even what a calendar was. He's a gangster cat of few words and the word calendar in English or Italian (yes, we speak a lot of Italian in our house) never springs from his lips.

       So, how does he know that a certain birthday is on the horizon? Is he pretending to be asleep but really eavesdropping on conversations?

        Birthdays are pretty special at our house. We plan an event. We go out to dinner. Sometimes we stretch the day to a weekend and call it a Birthday Weekend Celebration. 

        But, even so, I'm not particularly suspicious. Usually when the three of them gather on the landing, it's because they're hoping to crack us. Theo meows, a soft pitiful cry, that will convince anyone to do anything. SNACKS. That's what the cry is all about. Yeah, he may be a ruthless gangster cat who struts around on little cat feet with a swagger, but he can't live without his snacks. And the landing is directly outside the guest room, which the three of them have taken over and made the cat room. They know where the snacks are. They know three small glass bowls wait empty near the cat tree. 

        "It's only ten o'clock," I announce, "in the morning. You just had breakfast. You know the rule."

       But, honestly, there is no rule. The giving of snacks in our house is arbitrary. Dan is an easy target. He will cave to Theo's first meow. I'm tougher. Well, a little tougher.  So, I'm fooled initially. 

        Here is the video of that encounter. You tell me if they don't look oh so innocent.

       Only later do I notice something odd happening. On any given day the house is scattered with toys. Cat toys. Mice and anything else that even resembles cat prey are in every room, on every floor, in every doorway. They litter the stairs. They are on the master bed. They are even on bathroom counters. 

        Slowly, but surely, they start to disappear. Sure, I pick them up and return them to the cat basket. This disappearance of cat toys is different. It's done stealthily. If you blink, a toy will disappear. 

         You might think I'm exaggerating, but I'm a verified eye witness to the cat toy disappearance. Notice Sienna, the spy like way she's hiding herself under the drape, the tell-tale paw and the toy object before it disappears.

         

          What's going on? 

          Days slip by and more and more cat toys disappear. I'll catch Mico posed next to one of his favorite toys, and then nothing. Mico poses alone.

          I ask Dan, "What do you think is going on?"

          He looks at me as if I'm the crazy one. "Going on?"

          "Where are all the cat toys?"

          But he's busy reading his article for Italian class or practicing Bach on the piano. "Do we even have cat toys?" he finally asks.

          I resort to desperate measures. Interrogation of the third degree. I use the flashlight on my iPhone and shine it directly into the eyes of the gang of three. "Where are the toys?" 

          The three fur babies stand firm.

          Finally, in a gush of desperation, I peer under the guest bed with my flashlight. There carefully piled into an old basket, like some offering to the gods, are all the toys that no longer litter our house. 

         "Hey, what's this?" I ask Theo. Then Sienna. Then Mico. 

          My three rapscallions circle around, but no one says a meow. I'm on my stomach with the light from my cell phone. Gosh, now I see it. A bow drapes triumphantly across the basket of toys reading Celebration.

          A birthday surprise gift of all the fake mice they carry around and pretend to annihilate? Or are they just cleaning up the house to make mom happy? 

          I'll never know.

           

Three Rapscallions And the Partial Eclipse

    I'm a big fan of eclipses. I've never yet seen a total eclipse--where the world around you turns totally dark--but I never miss the chance to see what I can see when the fateful moon lands in front of the heavenly sun. The area you're standing in darkens. You look up and that usually round sun is no longer round--now it has taken on the properties of a partial moon--that tiny sliver that sits so confidently in the sky.

     It's exciting. It's magical. Even though I know it's science, pure and simple. Back in the day my dad, an electrical engineer, ran a company to market his products, his inventions. Some of those electrical trancells and diodes ended up on NASA rocket ships. I have a fond memory of sitting in our living room, staring at the tiny television screen, when Neil Armstrong, an American astronaut, landed on the moon. I felt proud. My dad was helping make that possible.

     So I've always been infatuated with the planets, the moon and those things we strive to understand more about. And, yeah, I guess I did my fair share of talking about the eclipse.

     The three rapscallions, who usually only seem to be listening when there is talk of a snack, must have been tuned in. Because . . . just as the eclipse was launching a show, the three of them lined up at the patio door to look outside. Theo, Mico, and Sienna, the three rapscallions.

      I'd warned them they weren't going to see a full eclipse. I told them that New Jersey was not in the pathway that ran from Texas to Maine.  Still . . .

      Was it pure coincidence that they were lined up as if I were giving out snacks, patiently waiting, looking out over our patio and then up . . . 

       Clouds rolled in, but they didn't obscure the beauty of the moment. You could see the sun--that unusual sliver of the sun--as it fought to maintain its presence in the sky. The moon continued to move in front of it, but the sun fought valiantly to shine through. And then it faded from sight.

        

       Later, when the sun reappeared, I asked Theo why they wanted to see a partial eclipse. He's a pure tabby of few words. First, he jumped onto a table and glanced out the window. "I had to do it, see?"

        I understood exactly what he meant. 

Bad Boy JoJo and the Play Gym

      T he news thrills us! My niece Leah is having a baby. We can't wait (my sisters and I) to drive down to North Carolina to go to her baby shower. 

     Baby showers are the best! All those cute outfits--miniature golf attire or baseball caps--yes, she's having a boy--inspire a room full of ooohs and aaahhs. 

     At first, I don't even think of bringing Theo along. After all--baby shower? And truth be told, he has no interest in miniature outfits or ooohing and aaahhing anyone. But he knew that besides Leah and Michael (and the baby), there are three other meows that live there--Vera, Plum and JoJo. Theo has no interest in the girls. But he desperately wanted to meet JoJo face to face.

    He'd heard things. JoJo is what we call a bad boy. Always into trouble. The day of the shower was no exception--knocking things over, disappearing with whatever was put out for company. Finally, my sister Caroline had to put JoJo under lock and key. A time out. 

    "Are you sure you want Theo to meet JoJo?" Leah asked. "He's a real handful and who knows what could happen."

    I considered. Could one meeting with a bad boy cat change Theo's personality? Yeah, we call Theo the gangster cat, but he's as sweet as pie. 

     Be positive. So there we are arriving at my niece's house. The three of us. Oh, excuse me. The four of us. Three humans and a cat.

      The food is delicious. Games are designed--guess how many M&Ms are in the baby bottle and design a block for the baby to play with. 

       

And while I keep busy, Theo sulks. He keeps giving me the stink eye. He wants to meet JoJo. He marches up and down their  stairs, then finally settles down. (This is Theo's version of the events later relayed to Mico and Sienna.) 

       

 

      Finally, JoJo is let out. Theo has just come down the stairs for a snack when JoJo appears in all his glory at the top of the stairs. 

          I could tell you that the room gasps. But that wouldn't be true. Everyone is so into the shower, no one notices JoJo being let out. 

       Except Theo, of course.

       

           And there they are--sniffing and eyeing each other up. They disappear up the stairs for a moment, and I can't help but think they are hatching some kind of plot to overthrow the baby shower. Now, I feel partially responsible and rush up the stairs. The two of them are huddled together in the nursery. The new baby play gym  is turned completely upside down.

          "What happened here?" I demand.

           JoJo doesn't say a meow.

           Theo meows very softly, "I had to do it, see?"

           "Had to do what, Theo?"

           The plot slowly unravels. JoJo has talked Theo into climbing into the new baby play gym. JoJo figures if Theo (all ten pounds of him) can fit into the gym, the baby can too. 

           "That's when it tipped over?"

           I quickly upright it. 

           "Is everything okay up here?" Leah has suddenly appeared like magic in the doorway.

          I can turn the both of them in, but why spoil my lovely niece's baby shower. 

          "Oh, yeah. The boys are bonding. And JoJo is telling Theo all about the baby."

          Leah smiles. "Good boy, JoJo."

          When she's gone, I rush over and wipe the gym clean of all Theo's cat hair. "Stay out of that baby gym. I'm surprised at you. You could have been the hero here."

          Theo rolls his big eyes. "Mom, you don't understand. I had to do it, see? JoJo pressure."

           

          

           

Theo's Hideout

    Antigua may have a rich history but it's not a fairytale history where life was beautiful all the time. 

     As we stand out our balcony gazing at a rapturous view . . .

     . . . an object from the past looms to the right of our villa. It is an ancient stone building that dates back to when Antigua was home to huge plantations that processed sugar and whiskey. With the forced labor from the enslaved Antiguans on the island.

      These ancient leftover structures dot the island--remnants of the past--reminders that when Antigua was a British colony, native Antiguans toiled on sugar plantations.

       We decide to visit on of those plantations--long since inoperative-- and now a memorial to the world that was. Betty's Hope documents a plantation that existed for over 200 years. Owned by the Codrington family, it was one of the richest plantations on the island, producing sugar and whiskey. The family rarely lived on the plantation. They hired an overseer to handle the business.

        The land is now barren. Two windmills still stand to greet us as we enter this place. In those days, wind power was key.

          Inside the Visitor's Center, there's a model of what the plantation used to look like in the 1800's and placards documenting the history.

         How much do we tell Theo, who is happily roaming the grounds, sniffing everything in his past? The story of what happened here is a near tragedy. Is he ready to hear how cruel mankind can be to his fellow man? 

          I keep a careful eye on Theo, but I'm not too concerned. There's little danger here. 

         On the grounds themselves, what remains of the great house (pictured on the placard below) stands on a hill. A fire destroyed most of it in the 1930's. The building stones were recycled to build an Anglican rectory. 

          

         

          Domestic and skilled workers hired to work on the plantation lived in smaller houses, made of stone. 

          Enslaved people were not so lucky. They lived in tiny huts made of perishable materials--mainly Wattle and Daub, which in layman's terms mean mud, manure, sticks and dried grass. There were hundreds of these huts at one time. Windows with no glass. A dried grass roof that has since deteriorated. We see one in the distance. Preserved so that we can see the bare bones of how most of the people who worked this plantation lived.

          The enslaved people who lived in these huts labored in the fields and the boiling house (where they made the sugar or whiskey). I try to imagine what their life must have been like. Cramped living quarters. Too hot in the summer. No privacy. 

           I want to see this hut more closely. I can't quite believe that a family could live in a hut like this. As I move towards it, Dan stops me. 

           "By the way, where's Theo?"

           I don't panic. On this plantation, dotted with ruins of a life that used to be, I should be able to spot this gangster cat in no time--sniffing the great house or the windmills or any of the other leftovers from over 200 years ago.

           We retrace our steps, examining everywhere we've already been--the great house, the worker's house. Dan runs back into the Visitor's Center. No Theo.

        We're in Antigua. The day is getting warmer. I think like a cat. "Where would he go? We know he loves the heat."

            We gaze around.  

            "You don't think . . ." The Wattle and Daub house. Theo has to be there. I'm spurred on by the realization that this house had to be so hot most of the year. Theo would love it.

           We take off briskly toward the Wattle and Daub hut, full of anticipation. As I'm racing towards it, I expect to see him. I know he's there. 

          I peek in. No Theo. What? Then I have a vision, an inspiration.

          There, behind the hut in the tall weeds, curled up and practically fast asleep, Theo is napping. Totally oblivious to the tragic history that surrounds him. He looks so content, I hate to disturb him.

                 

       But I do. "Theo, we were worried. You disappeared. For a nap."

          Theo rubs his eyes, clearly not happy he's been woken up by two overly protective parents. 

           "I did what I have to do. See?"

 

            I whisper to Dan, " He sounds just like a gangster." 

         Then aloud, I say, "I'm glad this place is here--to remind people where we are and where we've been."

          We meander back to our hired car, feeling blessed and so lucky.

Theo and the Devil's Bridge

     Call us crazy. Knowing what we now know, we would never take Theo with us. But . . . we figure Devil's Bridge in Antigua can't be that dangerous. After all, it's one of the recommended tourist attractions. If you hire a guide (like we do) for a tour of the island, you will almost certainly end up there. 

       It's famous. 

       All we know as we drive across the island is that Devil's Bridge is a natural formation. A sight to see. Our guide, an island native, assures us it is a sight not to be missed.

        "Theo, do you want to come with us?"

         Theo, with a wide eyed look on his face, shrugs. He doesn't seem all that interested, but he hops into the car, nevertheless.

          As we get closer and closer, we're treated to beautiful scenery. The water seems calm and peaceful. So far, so good. 

          Then we learn some interesting facts--that we shouldn't get too close because there is no jumping off the bridge located precariously near treacherous waves that beat against the rocks. There is no falling off the bridge. There is no slipping off the bridge. Because rescue is impossible.

          We learn that two Canadians disappeared--like totally gone and never seen again--at Devil's Bridge. We learn that people go there specifically if they don't want to come back. 

          We park some distance away and walk. We smell the sea. The sun is out. We feel the wind against our faces. But the water is no longer calm. It's angry. Aggressive even.

 

           "Keep an eye on Theo," I whisper to Dan.

           "Maybe we should have left him in the car."

            That suggestion begins to haunt me. It is slowly dawning on me that this place is dangerous in a weird sort of way. Don't get me wrong. We're not the only people here. Other tourists are milling around looking. Some have even left the less dangerous rock perch (which we're standing on) and have ventured further out--closer to the bridge of death (as I now imagine it.)

            There are no other animals in sight. No cats. No dogs. Even the birds seem to be giving this place a wide berth. 

            But everyone is standing around, talking, taking photos, even videos of this remarkable sight. 

            Theo hasn't left our side. But he is looking. The crashing waves can't be some kind of siren's call, can they? Remember, Theo is an odd cat. He doesn't dislike water. But, so far, he's being a good kid. 

 

         Dan decides that he can't get a good enough photo of the bridge. It is a bit mesmerizing when you stand there and watch the waves coming in and out. He ventures closer to the bridge. I keep my distance. The wet rocks are slippery. 

           I wish he wouldn't go out there. Bad thoughts spiral through me head. What if Dan slips and falls? No rescue. "Be careful," I shout, but he doesn't hear me. 

           Then I see it. Theo, who one minute is casually observing this treacherous bridge, decides--without saying a word or giving me any kind of warning--to follow Dan. He is literally teetering from one rock to the other as he makes his way closer to the crashing waves. Rocks that resemble volcanic rocks, an uneven surface replete with pits and holes.

         "Theo." 

          He doesn't hear me either. 

          This is not good. I see now that this is what people call a window of opportunity. Act now before it's too late. I follow, slip sliding over rocks that feels like glass.  

          Dan stops to take his video. Theo is moving closer to the end of the rock, the cliff. Sniffing. I cup my hands and shout as loud as I can. "Theo. Get Theo."

          But I am shouting into the wind, and my voice sounds like a whisper. Ten feet way, I estimate, and it hits me I might not get there in time. What if Theo runs away from me? What if he misjudges where the rocks end and infinity begins? What if he slips . . .

          Dan finishes his video and turns around. He sees Theo. A look of surprise flashes across his face. He takes a few steps and scoops Theo into his arms. He looks up.

          "Hey, what are you doing out here? It's kind of slippery."

          I have no words to express how I feel. I push the panic down deeper. And smile. 

          "He's quite a little adventurer, isn't he?" Dan marvels.

           "A real gangster," I reply as I take Theo from Dan. His fur feels like a wet ermine coat. 

           "Come on, you," I coo, so happy to have him safe and sound. At least for one more day.

           

          

          

          

          

Theo's Revenge

         Maybe we can just stay in Antigua forever.

       Dan is discovering (and I already discovered) that Antigua is a magical place. The temps are in the low eighties at this time of year in January, but a cool ocean breeze makes it possible to enjoy the sunshine without breaking a sweat.

       We leave Theo at our villa with his chow and snacks, go to dinner in a lovely out door restaurant, and now--just the two of us--get to enjoy Antigua at night. Technically, we are in the parish of St. John's, in the northwest portion of Antigua. It is the capital of Antigua, founded in 1692, and has a population of close to 60,000. 

         We can't resist taking a photo of our villa and of the pool that sits in front of where we're staying. 

 

        

      As we walk back from dinner, we feel like we've left Kansas (so to speak) like in the Wizard of Oz and are following the yellow brick road (in our case it's a pale white) towards a place filled with palm trees and Caribbean magic.

 

          The dream is short lived. The next morning we go to breakfast. I'd like to say that Theo's almost encounter with the bird--who we now realize was a pigeon--is forgotten. But I can tell that Theo has forgotten nothing. 

          He is gazing around--not at the beautiful scenery--but rather he is acting more like a spy in enemy territory. Expecting at any second to be ambushed. On high alert. 

         I try to calm him down. "We're going to breakfast. There's nothing to worry about."

         He looks at me as if I am delusional. 

         I order the Eggs Benedict but Dan orders the Antiguan breakfast--an interesting mixture of foods which includes salted cod. Fish. Theo begs for a piece, and it is in that moment of feeding Theo that the nightmare begins to unfold. 

          

         Suddenly a bird swoops into view--an unwanted visitor--and this time it is the Carib Grackle. And why am I surprised? His reputation has preceded him. So, this is the bold bird who will fly into a restaurant and steal the food right off your plate. 

           Carib Grackle hasn't seen us yet, but Theo has seen him. He immediately freezes. His normally sweet eyes turn into laser beams as he spots his new arch enemy.

            And then it happens. 

 

            The Grackle flies to a table close to ours and pretending not to notice Theo, begins his reconnaissance--searching for anything edible that he can scoop up and take back to his nest. He is a forager, a scavenger, eager to collect any food left over from the family who's just vacated the table. He spies the bread basket.  

              

             I'm thinking at this moment that this is a good development. Grackle eats the bread. Theo eats the fish. I glance down and Theo, super suspicious, has one paw protectively over the fish as if he is anticipating the Grackle's next move. 

      

         Would he dare? Steal the fish from a cat? And not just some ordinary cat. Theo has a reputation. He's a gangster cat, and he's not likely to take an enemy invading his territory lightly.

           I lean down and pet Theo for reassurance. He's sitting at my feet, partially under the table. But he isn't eating. He's watching. He's waiting. 

        

           "Eat the fish, Theo," I say, but Theo waits. Obviously, he knows the bird kingdom better than I do, and sure enough before I can say another word, the Grackle flies to the railing. He pretends to be grooming. He pretends to be totally unconcerned about Theo and his fish. 

            

           This bird was smart, I realize later.

        My guard goes down. Dan is eating his breakfast, and I sit back, about to finish mine. Too much worry about nothing. 

  

        A flash. A scuffle. Theo reacts better than I would expect. Carib Grackle swoops down low, as if he thinks he can swipe up the fish in his claws as he's flying by. Theo, one step ahead, sits on top of the fish.  He then raises his right paw like a fist to fend off the invader.

        The fight over the salt cod is over in a mini-second. The Carib Grackle flies off to another table. Theo relaxes and begins to eat. 

        Dan says, "What just happened?"

 

        "I'm not sure," I say, "but I think it's over, and Theo won."

         "For now."

         We glance down at Theo. "Well?"

          Cats can't smile. But if they could, I bet you he would have a big fat smile on his fishy face.

         

            

            

Theo's Gangsters at Play?

      One week later. You might be thinking. How is it going with those New Year's resolutions?    

        The jury is still out. I've been exercising more. Reading more. Eating healthier. Watching less trashy TV? Oh, you want to know about the gangster cats . . . how are their New Year's resolutions going.

        Are they begging for more snacks? Playing more? Sleeping more? Let's examine the evidence. This evening for instance. I hear Sienna on the stairs, engaged in some life and death struggle with an inanimate object that doesn't look like anything in particular. I call it playing. You tell me.

       Sienna says, "I'm honing my mouse catching skills, mom." 

       The day before Theo, Sienna and Mico are engaged in more active pursuits. "It shows up out of nowhere. See?" Theo says. "What are we supposed to do? Flashing colors and lights. Going here. Going there. Banging against walls. Under beds. It's possessed. See?"

        Mico said, "We think it might be after our snacks, right Theo?"

        "Oh, so in other words, you weren't actually playing with that mouse toy your aunt gave you for Christmas, you were  involved in a major investigation."

          

          Theo doesn't answer. He only strikes his typical gangster pose.

         And then there is the flopping fish incident. Sienna says, "Two giant fish suddenly appear. Out of water. They don't say anything. Just flop around."

         "They make this weird sound," Mico chimes in. "I chased them down the stairs." Mico still has this wide-eyed look on his face as if he'll be traumatized forever.

          "Flopping fish. You're referring to those fish I brought home from Costco as a present. I suppose you're going to say it was your sworn duty to apprehend them," I say. 

           The upshot of the entire conversation is that these three gangster cats insist they're not playing more, they're only doing what they have to do--practice their mouse catching skills, investigate strange objects that suddenly appear in the house, capture flopping fish. And, as for sleeping more?

           "Not us", they meow in unison, just before Mico hops into his big luxurious bed even though it's two o'clock in the afternoon. 

             

Theo Horses Around

     I discover later, after we're safely home, that Theo got the idea from YouTube. A horse on a farm--location unknown--fell for a cat. An unlikely pair, to be sure. They became fast friends, so much so, that the cat would jump on the horse's back and go riding. 

    That image of a cat on the back of a horse was the inspiration for Theo. 

    That's why when we're in Pennsylvania, riding around on a very beautiful day, Theo decides he wants to go horseback riding. 

    "Out of the question," is my first response. A horse and a cat? No way. 

    Theo, who is quickly developing a reputation as a little gangster cat,  gets that look on his face which essentially means he's not budging. At least, not yet. 

    We're riding past a pasture, and there are horses, of course, that are right there. And there is a place to park. 

    Dan smiles. "Come on. Let's humor the kid. It'll take five minutes."

    Now, I love horses myself. And if there is anyway I can get out of the car and jump on the back of a horse and go riding . . . like if this is a fantasy movie, and we just happen to have saddles in the back seat . . . and the horses are friendly and love to be ridden . . . and there's no fence or maybe one of of those low split rail antique numbers that we can easily hop over . . . and nobody's going to suddenly show up and have us arrested.  

    This is reality. There are no saddles in the back seat. And there is a fence, shoulder height, that no one is jumping over. And the horses are looking at us with suspicion in their eyes.

   

     I'm thinking--this is an impossible idea on Theo's part. 

    Theo comes waltzing up--every bit like a gangster would. He's got a certain style. A kind of confidence that I would not have if I were a cat facing at least ten equine beasts.

     But if I look closely, Theo's not looking at ten horses. He's looking at only one horse. And one horse is looking at him.

      

    Theo's eyes grow wide. He marches up to the fence. His nose goes high. He is sniffing. The horse moves even closer. And then she does something quite extraordinary. She lifts her foot off the ground, her knee bends, and she stomps it down. Once. Twice. She does the same thing with her other leg.                         

   Theo does the exact same thing. He lifts his tiny paw off the ground, kicks it forward and stomps it back on the ground. He does it again.

    I push any traitorous thoughts out of my head. For example, that this stomping horse could crush Theo's skull with a single kick.  

    Dan practically reads my mind. He shakes his head. "I think they're communicating. She wants to meet him. She's not going to kill him."

    "He's not going in there," I whisper. "Theo can stomp all he wants."

    But . . . I do pick Theo up and bring him closer to the fence. The horse does saunter over and they get a chance to go nose to nose and sniff each other. It is a close encounters of two different species who interact with each other moment. 

    When Theo wriggles to get free (no doubt he has visions of jumping on the horse's back and riding into the sunset), I hold him closer. 

     Later, when we're all safe at home, he is retelling the almost adventure to Michelangelo and Sienna, the two younger nine month old kittens we recently adopted, but in Theo's version the almost adventure sounds like it was an adventure.

    Mico's eyes are bigger than quarters. "Did you ride her, Theo?"

    "That was the plan, see?" Theo says in his usual Brooklyn style accent. "To ride across the fields. Bareback." He puffs his chest out.

     "Wow." Mico is impressed. He takes a few steps closer to Theo, maybe hoping that Theo's bravery will rub off on him.

     "Don't get so close, kid," Theo says. "I need my space."

                            https://youtube.com/shorts/Kug17lpcxP4